Thousands of people grieving months or years after a devastating breakup leave voicemails as part of a new podcast.
Even if your heart tries to pull its broken self together to tell you it’s for the best, and your head – foggy and sad – tells you the pain will pass, the agony of a breakup can be relentless.
When you’re recovering from a breakup, it’s important not to hurry things along – it’s your time to reset, recharge and draw wisdom from the experience – but what if your healing could be strong and complete … and quicker? Science may have just found the way.
Losing a significant relationship in life is never easy, especially after you and your former partner walked a journey together.
The good news is that the sadness doesn’t last forever, and brighter days lay ahead. Below are some tips to healing and finding happiness again.
Let Yourself Grieve
When we feel pain from a loss, allowing ourselves time to grieve is one of the most important steps in the healing process. Find healthy outlets where you can safely express your emotions.
Have a good cry (or a few), talk with supportive friends, write in a journal, see a counselor, or pray to your maker. Acknowledge the pain and hurt.
Take Care of and Pamper Yourself
It’s easy to feel sorry for oneself after separation, and in doing so neglect one’s own well-being. Some people self-blame, while others go into victimhood. There may be an urge to mope endlessly and wallow negatively. Some punish themselves consciously or unconsciously.
If you find yourself engaging in any of the above, may I ask have you decided to break up with yourself as well? Did you abandon the most important person in your life, YOU?
Surround Yourself With Healthy Support
As you heal, the support and encouragement of loved ones are essential to your regeneration. Embrace the affection of friends, family, or a beloved pet (the power of healing from animals is well documented). When interacting with your support system, there may be a desire to over-analyze your break up.
While some processing is important and healthy, avoid endlessly revisiting the past and rehashing old wounds. If you pay attention to only mud on the ground after a storm, you won’t notice the sky above has already cleared. Focus on the positives.
Engage In Physical Activities
There’s a saying in communication: “motion dictates emotion.” How we use our body affects greatly how we feel. The easiest way to feel lousy about yourself is to keep your head down, sit like a couch potato, and wallow in misery. Conversely, healthy and enjoyable activities such as exercising, singing, and dancing can energize your body, lift your emotions, and enliven your spirit. So get up and get active. Have fun, keep your head high, experience your vitality, and feel good!
Allow Yourself Peaceful Solitude
The next step in your healing process is to allow yourself peaceful solitude, and be comfortable in your own company. Engage in enjoyable, solitary activities that let you to feel peace and vitality on your own. Walking, cooking, gardening, art making and traveling are just a few examples. Get to know yourself again.